My spirit will go on living free…

E. is a young man who since his childhood is stuck in the phenomenon of blood-feuds. His childhood is made of fear, self-reclusion and isolation; his youth is in balance between frustration and research of a third way between being killed and killing. E. is walking on this third way though the road will be long. Below a script that E. has given us.

I was a little kid and I was walking down my street, happy steps.
The sky was blue!
There was also a lot of light.
I had a wish, a dream, a goal to achieve.
But a black cloud darkened the sky, the sun disappeared, there was an earthquake, I saw nothing more.
I lost control of the situation.
I heard a voice that called me from far away, and said: now you stay here!
Without waiting any longer, I began to open my eyes and look around.
I saw that I was alone, in a room
that had walls, walls, walls only.
I did not understand where I was.
Even what I was doing,
I just wanted to find a door to escape as quickly as possible from there.
There were a lot of darkness that frightened me.
It was that darkness that wanted to fight against me.
I looked for help, but nobody heard me, or pretended to be deaf.
At that moment I desponded a lot. That darkness made me sad.
And it did not care about me.
It continued to fight me, even if I was little!
Within those walls, without any light.
Eh! It was precisely that soulless darkness that destroyed everything.
It was that one who took my dreams.
It was that one who stole my desires.
It was that damn darkness that got me away from friends.
Yes. Yes. It was precisely that darkness that was destroying my family.
It was that soulless darkness that took my life.
And all I have left were some friends named tears.
Time passed and I did not understand what was happening.
I wanted to understand what it was this darkness.
Without waiting for a lot, I found a dusty book that was there for many years.
Cleaning it from dust, I understood what was written above.
I saw it was an old book, by a noble man, named Lek.
I understood that it was its book.
He had written some laws,
precisely the laws of darkness.
I continued to read the various rules in that book of many words.
And through each of these rules, the darkness hurt my heart.
I had no patience, wanted to read it quickly right to the end.
In the closing words of the book there was a beautiful sentence:
Each of these laws written in this book is for the darkness and is only for those who love darkness.
But you carry on fighting for freedom.
I realized what I was missing.
I started to look for it in every corner, in every time, in every place.
It is already many years that I keep trying.
Tired, desperate,
dead soul without a grave.
Did not leave me anything this darkness, but a last breath.
But I continue to struggle against it.
It would like to take me even this breath or life.
It would like me to lose this war.
But it does not know that I never lose.
That darkness does not know me well.
Let it get me everything. Let it kill me.
My spirit will go on living free…
(Written by E. – Freely translated in English by Sara Ianovitz – Photo of Giovanni Cobianchi)